Monday, October 5, 2009 at 8:11am
OK first of all, I am not, I don't believe, being "persecuted"by anyone. I don't even think the biblical phrase "fiery trial." applies (in the biblical sense) It could be a temptation (see below, certainly: "And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil. (Luke 11:4) This thing that grew in my head is an evil result of the Fall, and asking to be delivered from having to endure such an evil thing is appropriate, especially as it is connected with being led into temptation, and believe me, there are plenty of temptations associated with severe illnesses, from lashing out at your caregivers, to wallowing in self-pity, which, fundamentally, is simply a form of rebellion, to having the urge to call damnation down on things that frustrate or hurt you, like getting poked for an IV transfusion every other week,to questioning God and getting bitter against Him, to being stubborn and uncooperative, to having to (reluctantly) come face to face with the very real possibility of dying, and getting properly prepared for that.
Tribulation:no.
Testing: Probably this is the best label for what is happening to me. I teach Tests and Measurements over at the College (at least I did for 13 or so years but not now). A test is a task given to see if a person is able to successfully achieve some important outcome. I think my test is passed by exhibiting trust in God (Ps 56:3) "What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." for strength and grace (IICor. 12:9)"And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness", and by not falling into the temptations I listed above. Feel free to comment.
Chastening: Well, it certainly could be, He knows I have done enough to earn a good chastening (Job 5:17): "Behold, happy is the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty" (Heb. 12:11): "Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby." If it is chastening, I count myself privileged to be "exercised" by it.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Musing About Trials (becoming"able" to give comfort to others)
Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 10:27am
II Cor. 1): God is the God of all comfort, and believe me, there are times of yearning for comfort when you go through a major trial like this. Many Scripture passages have been a comfort--too many to list here. (I will put them together at another time. I said to Cindy about both Intensive care and Acute Rehab.--They're both good places to get well, but not good places to live. I had a tube down my throat in Intensive care, so I couldn't drink, and I'll tell you I was desperately in need of comfort & dying for a drink of water. Funny as it may sound, I found myself taking comfort in an old cowboy song I had on my computer called, "Cool Water." (OK, I don't really know if that was from the Lord, but it comforted me.) In receiving comfort from God, we find that we gain the ability to comfort others (II Cor 1:4): "Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God."
II Cor. 1): God is the God of all comfort, and believe me, there are times of yearning for comfort when you go through a major trial like this. Many Scripture passages have been a comfort--too many to list here. (I will put them together at another time. I said to Cindy about both Intensive care and Acute Rehab.--They're both good places to get well, but not good places to live. I had a tube down my throat in Intensive care, so I couldn't drink, and I'll tell you I was desperately in need of comfort & dying for a drink of water. Funny as it may sound, I found myself taking comfort in an old cowboy song I had on my computer called, "Cool Water." (OK, I don't really know if that was from the Lord, but it comforted me.) In receiving comfort from God, we find that we gain the ability to comfort others (II Cor 1:4): "Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God."
Musing About Trials (When You lose a Talent You Use to serve the Lord--Why?)
STuesday, October 6, 2009 at 3:24pm
OK, I had a few talents I was using for the Lord, or so I thought--my left hand, for example, I wrote with it, typed, signed my name, played my violin in church, well enough for offertory specials and to play along with the congregation (which I really enjoy), and, being somewhat ambidextrous, I was almost as strong with my left hand as with my right, and pretty handy around the house and in the garden and helping out on church work days. My vocal chords had some talents I used for the Lord (singing, talking), but they have been rather slow to recover from intubation, I can barely manage the entire bass clef and my breath support is shot. I taught at the college, of course, taught Adult Bible Fellowship at Church for years, sang in choir, sang duets with my wife, and sang quartets and other specials. All of that has been taken away, and some of it is questionable whether it will come back (violin playing, handwriting). This is the only area of my trial where I have asked "Why?" "Why were my main talents taken?" It's not because I wasn't using them, I was fairly active in vocal and instrumental special music. Comments welcome. One of my colleagues at the college with a beautiful voice lost it to a malady of some sort, I must talk to him about this.
OK, I had a few talents I was using for the Lord, or so I thought--my left hand, for example, I wrote with it, typed, signed my name, played my violin in church, well enough for offertory specials and to play along with the congregation (which I really enjoy), and, being somewhat ambidextrous, I was almost as strong with my left hand as with my right, and pretty handy around the house and in the garden and helping out on church work days. My vocal chords had some talents I used for the Lord (singing, talking), but they have been rather slow to recover from intubation, I can barely manage the entire bass clef and my breath support is shot. I taught at the college, of course, taught Adult Bible Fellowship at Church for years, sang in choir, sang duets with my wife, and sang quartets and other specials. All of that has been taken away, and some of it is questionable whether it will come back (violin playing, handwriting). This is the only area of my trial where I have asked "Why?" "Why were my main talents taken?" It's not because I wasn't using them, I was fairly active in vocal and instrumental special music. Comments welcome. One of my colleagues at the college with a beautiful voice lost it to a malady of some sort, I must talk to him about this.
Musing About Trials (Facing death)
Wednesday, October 7, 2009 at 12:58pm
When you have an incurable disease like mine (I will have to live with this for the rest of my life), you think about death. I have quite frankly enjoyed living nearly my entire life (for 49 years at least) (saved at age of 5) knowing my eternal destiny was secure, so what happens when/if I die from this is not and has not been on my mind. What is on my mind, Now that I have been married for nearly 30 years, the thought of death is much more difficult to face, leaving my sweet wife behind to go it alone is an extremely painful thought (brings tears to my eyes even as I type this), though we have seen to it that she's secure finance-wise. I admit. I hate the thought of leaving the house with the cute screen room we bought together and made so many happy memories in and are so close to having completely paid off, and leaving the apple trees I finally, just this year, learned how to make produce excellent apples, and leaving our flowers, and leaving my little 13 year-old puppy, and leaving the trike my sweetheart bought me (I know some of those are just "things," and I'm a bit ashamed to admit my strong emotional attachment to "things of this world." Hope I never in eternity (even in my glorified body) forget the life I had down here with Cindy I hope "tears being wiped away" doesn't mean our memories are erased:
(I confess I switched the "you" and "I" around in this poem to make it fit better) "Should I go first and you remain
To walk the road alone,
You'll live in memory's garden, dear,
With happy days we've known.
In spring you'll wait for roses red,
When fades the lilac blue,
In early fall, when brown leaves call
You'll catch a glimpse of me.
Should I go first and you remain
For battles to be fought,
Each thing I've touched along the way
Will be a hallowed spot.
You'll hear my voice, you'll see my smile,
Though blindly you may grope,
The memory of my helping hand
Will buoy you on with hope.
Should I go first and you remain
To finish with the scroll,
No length'ning shadows shall creep in
To make this life seem droll.
We've known so much of happiness,
We've had our cup of joy,
And memory is one gift of God
That death cannot destroy.
Should I go first and you remain,
One thing I promise to do:
I'll Walk slowly down that long, lone path,
For soon you'll follow me.
I'll want you to know each step I take,
That you may walk the same,
For someday down that lonely road
I'll hear you call my name.
Yet, "to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord," and we both know this. She may yet precede me in death, of course, through an accident or sudden illness, that's one of life's unknowns. Feel free to comment.
Cindy wrote: This certainly will be the hardest thing to face, being separated from the one I love, but for now all I can focus on is living and soaking up every minute we have together and making memories that I'll treasure for a lifetime. You are the best treasure that God gave me here on earth!
When you have an incurable disease like mine (I will have to live with this for the rest of my life), you think about death. I have quite frankly enjoyed living nearly my entire life (for 49 years at least) (saved at age of 5) knowing my eternal destiny was secure, so what happens when/if I die from this is not and has not been on my mind. What is on my mind, Now that I have been married for nearly 30 years, the thought of death is much more difficult to face, leaving my sweet wife behind to go it alone is an extremely painful thought (brings tears to my eyes even as I type this), though we have seen to it that she's secure finance-wise. I admit. I hate the thought of leaving the house with the cute screen room we bought together and made so many happy memories in and are so close to having completely paid off, and leaving the apple trees I finally, just this year, learned how to make produce excellent apples, and leaving our flowers, and leaving my little 13 year-old puppy, and leaving the trike my sweetheart bought me (I know some of those are just "things," and I'm a bit ashamed to admit my strong emotional attachment to "things of this world." Hope I never in eternity (even in my glorified body) forget the life I had down here with Cindy I hope "tears being wiped away" doesn't mean our memories are erased:
(I confess I switched the "you" and "I" around in this poem to make it fit better) "Should I go first and you remain
To walk the road alone,
You'll live in memory's garden, dear,
With happy days we've known.
In spring you'll wait for roses red,
When fades the lilac blue,
In early fall, when brown leaves call
You'll catch a glimpse of me.
Should I go first and you remain
For battles to be fought,
Each thing I've touched along the way
Will be a hallowed spot.
You'll hear my voice, you'll see my smile,
Though blindly you may grope,
The memory of my helping hand
Will buoy you on with hope.
Should I go first and you remain
To finish with the scroll,
No length'ning shadows shall creep in
To make this life seem droll.
We've known so much of happiness,
We've had our cup of joy,
And memory is one gift of God
That death cannot destroy.
Should I go first and you remain,
One thing I promise to do:
I'll Walk slowly down that long, lone path,
For soon you'll follow me.
I'll want you to know each step I take,
That you may walk the same,
For someday down that lonely road
I'll hear you call my name.
Yet, "to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord," and we both know this. She may yet precede me in death, of course, through an accident or sudden illness, that's one of life's unknowns. Feel free to comment.
Cindy wrote: This certainly will be the hardest thing to face, being separated from the one I love, but for now all I can focus on is living and soaking up every minute we have together and making memories that I'll treasure for a lifetime. You are the best treasure that God gave me here on earth!
Musing About Trials (walking in the valley) Morning Musing About Trials (walking in the valley)
Thursday, October 8, 2009 at 5:21am
It is a comfort to know that when our path leads through a valley, the Good Shepherd's rod is there to protect, and the staff is there to guide. I am protected, and if I heed the touch of his staff, I will not lose my way. Psalm 56:3
What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.Hebrews 13:5 Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee
Written last Thursday · Comment · Like / Unlike
Cindy Stratford
Cindy Stratford
Cindy StratfordThis certainly will be the hardest thing to face, being separated from the one I love, but for now all I can focus on is living and soaking up every minute we have together and making memories that I'll treasure for a lifetime. You are the best treasure that God has given me here on earth!
It is a comfort to know that when our path leads through a valley, the Good Shepherd's rod is there to protect, and the staff is there to guide. I am protected, and if I heed the touch of his staff, I will not lose my way. Psalm 56:3
What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.Hebrews 13:5 Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee
Written last Thursday · Comment · Like / Unlike
Cindy Stratford
Cindy Stratford
Cindy StratfordThis certainly will be the hardest thing to face, being separated from the one I love, but for now all I can focus on is living and soaking up every minute we have together and making memories that I'll treasure for a lifetime. You are the best treasure that God has given me here on earth!
Musing About Trials (chastisement)
Thursday, October 8, 2009 at 5:45am
But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. (Hebrews 12:8) "My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction"(Proverbs 3:11-12)"
Correction is connected with the development of wisdom and understanding:
For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.
13Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth understanding. (Proverbs 3:11-13).
Even Jesus was chastised, though of course He did not deserve it, it was for our sins he was chastised :
But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. (Is. 53:5)
If what I'm going through is chastening, then I welcome it, because of the very positive outcome: Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.(Heb. 12:11)
"peaceable" means "salutary":
1. favorable to or promoting health; healthful.
2. promoting or conducive to some beneficial purpose; wholesome.
But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. (Hebrews 12:8) "My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction"(Proverbs 3:11-12)"
Correction is connected with the development of wisdom and understanding:
For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.
13Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth understanding. (Proverbs 3:11-13).
Even Jesus was chastised, though of course He did not deserve it, it was for our sins he was chastised :
But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. (Is. 53:5)
If what I'm going through is chastening, then I welcome it, because of the very positive outcome: Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.(Heb. 12:11)
"peaceable" means "salutary":
1. favorable to or promoting health; healthful.
2. promoting or conducive to some beneficial purpose; wholesome.
Musing about my trial (epilepsy in the Bible)
Thursday, October 8, 2009 at 7:30am | Edit Note | Delete
Yes, a person who has a tumor removal such as mine often develops epilepsy, and I am no exception (seizures--mine are "partial focal"--affecting my left side only) (it's from the scar tissue left over from the operation). There's a fascinating article about Jesus healing the epileptic boy (Matthew 17, Mark 9) here:
http://www.desitin.no/index.php/artgallery/detail/1312
and here:
http://www.desitin.no/index.php/artgallery/detail/1307
Also look at "famous epileptics in Representational art (I)" for an interesting discussion that Paul's thorn may have been epileptic fits (as portrayed by Renaissance artists).
Yes, a person who has a tumor removal such as mine often develops epilepsy, and I am no exception (seizures--mine are "partial focal"--affecting my left side only) (it's from the scar tissue left over from the operation). There's a fascinating article about Jesus healing the epileptic boy (Matthew 17, Mark 9) here:
http://www.desitin.no/index.php/artgallery/detail/1312
and here:
http://www.desitin.no/index.php/artgallery/detail/1307
Also look at "famous epileptics in Representational art (I)" for an interesting discussion that Paul's thorn may have been epileptic fits (as portrayed by Renaissance artists).
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
