MUsing about my trial (How did THIS become His (good) will for my life??

I think preachers need to deal with with this topic differently. The fact that Christ begged to be excused from the death He was to die, and that Paul asked 3 times to be delivered from his affliction, which may have been epilepsy, by the way, is compelling that one may ask to be delivered from the (bad) trial they are going through. (It seems to me that they (Preachers) can't bring themselves to allow the sheep in their flock the latitude to say, "It was NOT "good" that ____ happened to me", whatever the ____ happens to be, there seems to be a compulsion to force people grudgingly to say "____ was good," no matter what the "____" is. I think we do a disservice to God's goodness also when we are compelled to say, "this is His good Will for my life," as if He reached into a big bag at the beginning of my life and picked out a ball marked "brain tumor" for me and then said, "OK, that's a good one for Steve--Oh, around age 50 sounds good" I believe God is good but not cruel, and that He knows what will happen in advance, (otherwise He wouldn't be omniscient). However, it IS His Permissive Will that He allowed it to happen to me(otherwise He wouldn't be sovereign (and could have stopped it, otherwise He wouldn't be omnipotent) as part of the natural consequences of living in a sin-cursed world. However, we are to give thanks for everything.